Tearplops on my pillow

Yes hallo then, it’s me Scowt, you look nice, I like those shews. Lissun, I no you has missed me becos yous been specting me to rite blog artikkles all threw May but I had sum ishoos witch I will hexplain.

1. Mum wont let me use her appole pomcuter becos I get dog hares all over it *happaruntly*…

2. I wos too hungry, I ownlee had bazgetty golernaise ONCE in the hole ivvent!

3. The new chikkins have been boollying me

So you can see wot I hav bin up against?

To bee onnist I am reely sad it’s awl over for anuther year becos I will miss seeing all of yor luvly piktchurs evry day, where you look all swetty but happy and are poolling funny faissis and mum’s sitting thare gowing “Ohh SCOWTY just look at this wun of Tomarto with his funny angree run faiss aggen, ha ha haaaar!” Or “Oh emm jee, this wun will reelly make you larf Scowty! LOOK, this laidee’s little boy has dun ay poo in his trowsers, HAR HA HAAAA!!!” To be onnist (aggen), I was seeriussly impressd with that wun…………….HELLO PATT RICK!

Do you know wot has bin like SOW annoying tho innit?! Lots of times we bin running along all like a cupple of gazells and suddunly mum has to do ay flipping viddeo! She’s all like “Well hellow evrybody it’s day blah blah blah, and heer I am and it’s WINDY blah blar blar, and I love you blar blah blarr…..” And I’m thinking COME. ON .WUMMUN Theres ay sheep poo in about ay mile wiv my name on it! She’s a right softee too, on da last day we were running along and her eyes started wartering and she said “Oh Scowty, I am SOW happy abowt what evrywun has acheevd and I am gowing to miss them, don’t yew think it feels kwite sad??” And I’m like “Yes muvva but thare is nuthing in this wurld that carnt be put right by sossidgizz. So just keep thinking of them and we can hav sum wen we get home, yes?? Muvva? YES???” She juss hignored me and kept on blubbering. WIMMIN (Mum if yous reeding this I hacktchly love yoo, kiss kiss kissssssssssss xxxxxx)

I wonnt to say thank yew to evrywun for doing all that hexercise and for raising about twelvety sixteen milliun pownds for Dimbulbee Cancer Cair. I am always thinking aybowt the peeple who have cancer and who will be made ay little bit happyer by what we have done. I wonnt to send all of them ay lick, and not eevun wun of my sheep poo wuns becos that would be a bit rude and I just saiv those for mum and peeple I has awlreddy met. I wonnt them awl to get better. That is wot I awlways wish xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Sow it’s goodby for aynuther yeer, and wen I see yew again I will be four yeers old sow you probally wownt eevun rekkernize me.

I hope you are missing me awlreddy, becos I am missing you reely ay lot :’-(

Come back next yeer becos I love you.

All my love, SCOWT XXXXXXXXXX

Pee. Ess. Any sossidge downayshuns to be sent to my howss furst, sow I can send them to dimbulbee cancer cair………….. OKAY?

Pee pee ess. Downt forget I love you xxx