Well wot ay time I haffs had laytly, I shal bring you hup to dayt.
Furst of all I want to tell you bout me’s new Jak Russole sista, Buttmeg. Hers naim is hatcherly NUTMEG (it yewsad be Jakky but mum sed that was too hunnorijjinal) Buttmeg was juss carmly handed to Wonkee Pets Reskew after liffing with her peeple for thurteen yeers. Can yew berleef that?? She luffs kissis and skweeziz and shee can haktcherly tawlk azwell. We went too klekt her on Munday and I hid in the bak of the car bcos she lookd scairy and kept trying to skweez nex to me on me’s seat. Wen we got home she had to haff ay barth and mum tryed hers new harniss on her. She wos lyke ay new gerl and she has bin dooing Evry Day in May with us, all over da feelds evry day, she runs along smyling and sumtimes I use her for me’s leepfrog praktiss but Mum orlways showts “SCOUTY DONT BEE SUTCH AY PLONNKA!” Pffft.
Funnyfing was dat muvva didnt tell the howss-dad abowwt Buttmeg coming to liff wiv us bcos she say “We wood nevva maik enny divveloppmunts iffs we arsked his pimmishunn!” So wen he seed Butty he starrtid showwting at muvva “YEW STEWPID WUMMAN HOW MENNY MOR HANIMULES IS YEW GOWING TO BRWING INTO DA HOWWSS???!!! HAZZIFF THARE IZZUNT EENNUFF SHEET TO CLEER UPP AROWND HEER WOT IZ YOU GOWING TO DOO WITH THIS WUN AZZIFF WE DOWWWNT SPEND HEENUUFF ON THE HEETING BLAH BLAH BLAH????!!” Then hee looked ay bit breffliss an slummped bak into hiss tellyffishun chare. Mum juss carmly hignorrd him and maid ay cup of tee, she sez “Ay cuppa iz the annsa to heffreethink in thiss wurld Scowtee boy.” She is nawty but I luffs her.
So yes then. We haffs stil been running hevry day for tenkay and we is getting farster and fartser (sorri bowt that typo but I lyked it sow I left it thare) I has bin down bajja howls, chaised hares and rabbits, fowwnd new logs to carry, had sevvrul barths in dittchiz but the best bit was when mum went into ay little woods for ay tinkle (she orrlways duz that, I dont know why she duzzent go beefor she leefs the howwss!) and I fowwnd sum ded chikkins that had been left for da foxxiz. Oh Em Jee I was shnufflinn arrownd them for ayjiz trying to wurk owwt how I cood get thems howm so mum cood stuff lemmuns up thare bums and rowst them up for dinna lyke she does but apparuntly we “HAFF TO GOW NOW SCOWTY, COME ONNN, WOT ISS YEW DOOOING OVVA THARE, WE HAFFS OWR TENKAY TOO FINNISH?!!” God shee is BOSSEEE!
Apark from that heffreethink has been normull.
Thankyew for taiking park in Effree Day in May, I know iss not ezy fyndink the tyme, and wot yew is dooing is sow speshul to all the peeple who has hads ay strowk and will bee helppd by our lufflee charitea.
I juss wonnt to sayhallo to awl the dogs wot is tayking part. HALLOW to mes gerlfrend KARA Collywog Cross (hubba hubba), me’s best mait, Ronnie, Dotty the Jack Russole and all the other hownds. I howp thay is orrl getting extra sossidgiz and TOWST.
That is it from mesowgudself fnow.
Orrl my luffs and kissis.
Scowt x x x x x
Pee ess lees may yew sponnsa me ? We haffs maid ATE THOWSUN POWNS SO FARR!! xx